Posts Tagged ‘Next Chapter’

Turning A Corner – Reorganize to Process Life Changes

Tuesday, December 6th, 2011

Life changes and major events interrupt our lives in ways that we cannot imagine.

Whether the changes are joyous (welcoming a family member), unexpected (a job loss, major surgery) or tragic ( loss of a loved one), these changes leave us with homes, belongings, and schedules that no longer meet our needs or help us live our lives. Reorganizing is an important part of processing any life change.

Reorganizing is useful, because you’re changing your schedule, office or home to meet your new ways of living. Systems cannot be static, because life isn’t, and systems are what give you the time to deal with the life change.

Organizing, I often say, is a means to an end. The end is the results you want – to have more time,energy or a modified space to handle the life event.

How  do you know when you’re ready to shift, to change your systems, reorganize your space or declutter your past?

When you feel as if you’re turning a corner.

Turning the Corner – Michigan Forest Land

When you’re more often than contemplating creating physical and mental space for your next chapter – whether you know what it looks like or not. Decluttering your  home, your schedule, and creating the new.

Only you can judge that timing.

Take your time. Live with what you have until it feels like you’re “turning a corner.”  When the “old” truly feels like the past. When you want something new.

You’ll know it or you’ll feel it. You’ll see it clearly if you’re visual.  Listen to your voice and only yours. Because if you don’t, you’ll make decisions you may regret later on.

So wait until you know it’s time. Until you can see that last corner … just before you begin your next chapter in life. And then it’s time to reorganize and create something comfortable but new.

 

Stay tuned for details: On January 6th, I’ll be the guest on my publisher’s webinar “Help Me Organize after a Life Change.”

Do Your Surroundings Become You?

Thursday, November 3rd, 2011

You can read several meanings into this blog title, can’t you? Do your  surroundings inspire you? Or do they bring you down, with more clutter than you can tolerate? Does the clutter reflect how fast your life is passing by? Do your things bring you comfort or is it more like protection from something else?

If you’ve been through a big life change lately – of your choice or not – then your surroundings really may not become you. Perhaps a parent or spouse passed away. Your relationship splits up. You choose to leave corporate for another career or to go out on your own. You or someone you love is facing major surgery or treatment. You decide you want to move and downsize.

When the dust settles, you may find yourself surrounded by your past—your belongings or home reflect who you were before your transition, but now things have changed. You may be feeling this already – that some of your belongings are no longer  in  sync with the person you are becoming. They really feel  like … clutter.

What to do ?

Approaching life in chapters allows you to close the door on the past (while still honoring it) and fully embrace your present. When you live this way, you give yourself permission to declutter so you’ll be be more comfortable with choices you make. You’ll keep the best or the essence of the past and bring it forward, while  making room for your next chapter’s experiences.

What is “organized enough” to you? Only you and your household members are the judges of what is “organized enough.” If you try to organize to someone else’s standards, the systems will be harder to keep up with because they were not designed for your lifestyle or ways of thinking and remembering. And so the clutter returns in these cases. Find your own answer.

Your values relate to organizing.  Values help you figure out which belongings you really need in your life. Love to learn? Weed out and reorganize something else, not the books. Keep what you love, what gives you joy, sustains and motivates you.

Decluttering and reorganizing systems plays a big part in keeping our calm. If we hold onto the ways we used to manage life and our things, and yet this life change has occurred, it’s harder to accept what is and move on.

Suddenly these systems work against us instead of with us, even if they once fit beautifully into our lives. New systems for new times. Systems do outgrow their owners, especially as we experience life’s changes. A parent moves in, you adopt a child, add a puppy, or are widowed: in each case, your systems need to shift as your circumstances change, so that you keep up (and keep calm!).

Declutter – internally: Internal clutter includes old ideas, attitudes, beliefs and reactions which no longer serve the person you are. They may be hold-overs from how you were raised or from a past relationship -but there’s the point – these are in the past. You may believe what others say about you, just because they’ve always said it (distracted, not creative, not with it). But these gremlins, too, can be decluttered. New chapter, fresh start.  

When we declutter, the mental and physical space we create by letting go of things that belong in our past gives us new energy for our next chapter. Our focus is forward, with respect for what’s behind us— because what’s behind us is a large part of who we have become.



Are You Ready to Work with an Organizer ?

Wednesday, October 19th, 2011

It takes a lot to make a phone call to a professional. How we are raised, our experiences with reaching out, our desire to be successful on our own and practical reasons contribute to a decision. When  you have a good experience – or even a great one! – the next step out is easier. And then you realize that when you do reach out, you gain a new perspective on an old problem.

 

“The thinking it took to get us into this mess is not the same thinking that is going to get us out of it.”

- Attributed to Alfred Einstein

I’ve attached a useful article written by a colleague, Linda Samuels.  She is a fellow member of the Institute for Challenging Disorganization.

She walks us through the stages of change – in her own words…

Initial Rumblings

-Identifying Possibilities

-Reaching Out

-Beyond Talking

-Life Jolts.

 

If you’re not used to reaching out, that doesn’t have to be the case forever.

I reach out when I need: outside expertise or perspective on my life or business; I don’t have a strength or a skill to do what  I know needs to be done; I know how and what, but I need accountability to someone else — that was probably the most difficult for me, but it’s proven so useful personally and professionally.

We can’t be great at all things, so why not choose to be great at what makes us feel good and get some assistance with the other stuff. Nothing wrong with that and it gets us from point A to point B that much faster and more easily.

This, whatever “this” is, just doesn’t need to be such a struggle if there are others with great ideas and talents for it.

So take a look at Linda’s article, and while you’re reading it, think about a specific part of your life you’d  like to finally deal with.

And if it makes sense, let’s talk.  The article link: Readiness for Change

Organizing & Life Changes: 10 Suggestions for Organizing through Change

Wednesday, August 24th, 2011

Their daughter is getting married. Her partner was very ill and is coming home. Her business is in its own next chapter, as it grows into something different. She is looking ahead to surgery with a long rehab phase.

How does organization fit? Here’s what they’d tell you – it’s fairly similar from person to person.

They are organizing to move on – releasing some of their past, to make mental and physical space for an upcoming chapter – even if they don’t know what that chapter will hold for them.

This type of organizing is about mindset and values – what’s important now becomes different, as you move through a life transition. The past is a bit easier to let go of. The future is even more unsettling and unpredictable though.

How Does it Feel?

  • I’ve gained such clarity during this whole time. It’s so clear what I need to do. But there’s so much I want to do now. Where do I start?
  • I need more time to take care of me and it’s hard to find in my life right now.
  • I don’t know how I’ll fit in everything. My unpredictable schedule will be difficult to take in stride, even though I know I’m doing the right thing. How do I focus on “now,” and stay present for the one who needs me.
  • How can we reorganize my schedule, decluttering it so I have more time for what’s become more important.
  • Who can help – at home, at the office? So much I want to do to get the business to the next  level; where do I start?

Ten Suggestions

Changes interrupt our lives. These changes and transitions leave us with homes, belongings, and schedules that no longer work for us. Something is out of alignment, and we’re not sure what. Reorganizing to a new normal way of living (with our time and our ‘stuff’) can make the changes easier to take on, whether we reorganize home, office or schedules.

Your values relate to organizing.  Values help you figure out which belongings you really need in your life. Love to learn? Weed out and reorganize something else, not the books. Keep what you love, what gives you joy for life, what sustains and motivates you.

What is “organized enough” to you? Only you and your household get to be the judges of what is “organized enough” in your home. If you try to organize to someone else’s standards, you will not be as committed. And the systems will be harder to keep up with because they were not designed for you.

Why is getting reorganized important, particularly now? Your organizing systems will work best for you and you’ll be most motivated to declutter stuff or time when you tie organizing to your goals. Inspiring, motivational, and it gets done!

Build on what you know. Don’t ask what’s NOT working w/your organizing or systems. Ask what IS working and what ‘sort of’ works? Build on what’s there. Many systems at a time of life changes will be a ‘draft’ version anyway – temporary, as your life comes together again in new ways.

Be a role model. Organize you and your stuff first. Then help others in your household – you may be surprised at how much they notice and follow!

Time is fluid. What’s important to you now? That’s what to fill your calendar with. Forget about the future for awhile. Too much future thinking is overwhelming. And by the time the future arrives, will it be what we envisioned? Usually not.

Maintenance comes first. Sometimes your organizing system seems perfect …  until you realize how complicated it’s going to be to keep up with. Consider maintenance as you design new ways to stay organized.

It’s about you – remember to take care of yourself.  If you give up what makes you tick as you’re going through a life change, you’ll find your days more of a struggle. Whatever it takes – keep with some level of your exercise, your good eating, your perfect cup of tea, or your reading time when you’re going through a big life change. You may not be able to exercise every single day in the same way; but can you take a quick walk for 10 minutes? That may be all you need, but it IS something.  Find small ways to care for yourself, or ask friends if you can be accountable to them.

Organization, in times of crisis, can be a lifesaver. You can’t organize your way out of everything, but you don’t have to be a victim of circumstances either. Accept quickly that things are changing. Adapt your behavior, change your systems even if it’s temporary, and manage your schedule to some small degree. Doing something will help you feel more in control during these unnerving times … unnerving is due to change, any change, whether it’s a beautiful welcomed change or one foist upon you. Change is change.

 

Life’s Big Changes – Coach on Through to Your Next Chapter

Thursday, July 7th, 2011

Remain coachable. No matter how successful you are, there is always someone who can see what you cannot. -Cynthia Renee Frazie

Life changes … and then, at some  point, we realize we need to get ourselves organized  to move on. This is where coaching supports — organizing your life to move on, create a new chapter,  let go of enough of the past – but not so much you regret it.

Your partner or parent has left or perhaps passed away. Now what? You think you’re ready to move on. Your home needs to be “yours” but you don’t want to dishonor memories or move too fast.

You’ve been a caregiver or very involved in a parent’s illness.  How to use your time  differently now that you have more of it.

You’re divorced or soon to be. You want to make your home your own now. What’ s important? Where to start? How to tackle a whole house and make it your own.

You always followed someone else’s organizing systems for  bill paying, mail, time, house maintenance. You want to or need to take them on now, but where to begin? How to make them your own?

There’s a new and different energy in the household: children, grandchildren, pets or host children. How do you manage your very different household, all who live there, meals, bills, time, stuff?

You’re pre-empty nest or there now. What’s next for you? Creating a new life chapter but how and where to start.

Finally, you get the explanation, the AD/HD diagnosis: acceptance, new ways of organizing your days, figuring out your version of a life that fits you, organizing in new, organic ways that make sense to you.

Breaking big issues (or projects) into smaller steps. Where to begin. How to start and stay with it. You’re stuck and can’t figure out why or where to head next.

Career change to self-employment: You’re on your own and it’s just too flexible. Keeping your home/office boundaries clear (space and time). Controlling papers, piles, emails.

Self-employment — scaling up - taking next steps to grow your business. Some of us are creators. Some create order out of the chaos created by the creators. And some will maintain. Which are you best at?

Motivation, procrastination, stalling, not getting started or staying stuck – You want  it to change.

Organizing your time and your days differently – for more productivity at work or for better balance/grounding in your personal life.

Not sure how coaching for organizing works  or not sure it’s for you?

Call to explore.  No charge to explore …and no selling.

If it’s a fit, we will both know it.

603 765 9267 or Sue@OrganizeNH.com or simply register to receive blog updates and get to know more.

“Coaches have the ability to view things from afar – in what
some call ‘helicopter vision’ – and to shed new light on
difficult situations. Often they can act as a sounding board
through tough decisions, help sharpen skills, and motivate.”

from CFO Magazine