Coaching for Better “Big” Decisions – for Me

A client once mentioned that “filters” were a useful way to make big decisions in business.  My ears perked up.

I had recently made a couple of big decisions and reversed them after further thought and discussion with someone I trusted.

And then I started the second  guessing we’re all familiar with sometimes. I knew I needed a new way to organize my thinking to make these big, uncomfortable, potentially risky decisions.

How could I approach these decisions with a new perspective and with more useful thinking? I turned to an Organizer Coach, not myself, but to a colleague in my advanced class.

I’m using myself as an example for two reasons (1) to illustrate the organizer coaching process without needing to change details to protect a client (2) because people often want to know that organizers are not perfect. (I admit to that readily, but sometimes an example is more believable!)

Self-awareness

Our coaching process went something like this.

What made you think these decisions were initially not right? How did you first think about your answers?

*I have too much to do already and might get overwhelmed – then not do a  good enough job with everything else.

What do these decisions have in common for you?

*New areas for me. Haven’t done that before. Not sure how to do it. Not sure if I have all the skills for it.

What other big decisions have you made in your life – which you thought turned out well/successfully for you?

*My junior year abroad decision in college. I almost didn’t go (fear) but talked with people who had gone before. I couldn’t pass it up after  that.

I did the best I could, jumped and closed  my eyes – thinking I could probably figure out what I didn’t know, or  rely on friends again.

*Career choices – new jobs/my company. There was always someone gently pushing me to consider the new horizon – someone who believed in me a bit more than I did in myself right then.

*My new  book. The publisher approached me based on my blog writing- and yet, for years, several people told me I was a good writer and should do something about that.

How did you approach making those decisions?

*I guess when I think about it, I talked to other people about the idea.

Found someone who believed in me a little more than I did right then in the wake of a big decision.

Talking about it got me comfortable with the parts I was nervous  about.

They raised good points and questions to consider, so I had more decision criteria to use.

Became less about the emotions this way.

And with time, I realized that I knew more and had more skills than I’d initially thought.

And so, thinking about these recent decisions,  what would have made you comfortable ?

*Talking with someone out loud. *And having some of those decision criteria to practice and use – to take some of the emotion out of the process.

Is changing your mind a positive or not, in your mind?

*Usually I don’t think of  it as a good thing – that once you decide, that  should be your commitment.

But here, changing my mind was  a really really good thing.

So what criteria might you use? …. Read my next post for my new criteria ! Look for it tomorrow.

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